Should I Stay or Should I Blog?

Just so everyone knows, the previous blog post wasn't about any couple in particular. I'm generally happy with most couples, save a few (you know who you are (just kidding (or am I? (parentheses are fun)))). Anyway, I'm just annoyed with couples as a concept. And couple politics. But that rant I feel is for another day.

Oh, and I'm happy for my uncle, even thought I find it odd. He's had a really hard time. He deserves joy. I'm left though with some medical questions that I really shouldn't think about. But I'm curious.

I found out today that my dad has to get a heart cathedar (sp?). It's a simple proceedure but it's to determine if he has any blockages in his arteries. It upset me. It all started when I was 11 with the same proceedure. Actually, I have an interesting story about that first heart cath which I have never told, but is not appropriate for blogs. I don't know if anyone would believe it, but it's true. Maybe you'll catch it in my memoir.... Anyway, it upset me a lot. I feel like "here we go again". I spent my whole life waiting for my father to die, and I thought he might finally be ok, but now I don't know. I used to spend hours thinking about what I would do if my dad died of heart failure and my mom died of cancer. I was almost positive they would. I had elaborate plans of me having to sell the house and take care of my sister and get a job and then eventually move. It's really too much pressure for a kid. Anyway, all those feelings came back today. They've been in hiding for a while.

Christmas Day was nice and quiet. I actually had an enjoyable holiday for once. It wasn't stressful at all.

I bought the game "Apples to Apples" and it's the funnest game EVER. I love it. I want to get a group of friends together and play. Are there still plans for a sleepover party? If so, we MUST play this game.

Speaking of plans, NYE is approaching and I'm a libran. I can't decide what to do. I kind of just want to be alone. Beckie says I'll be miserable, and she may be right. Here are my options so far, with pros and cons:

Woodhaven @ Beckii's - Pros: Friends, Low Key, Fun, Close to Toledo. Cons: Talkers, One-Uppers, Couples, Strange Environment.

My Sister's - Pros: 2 Kegs, Drinking Games, Relaxing, Close to Brooklyn. Cons: A lot of people I don't know

Chicago - Pros: Chicago. Cons: Expensive, Far Away, Can't be there long.

Hanging With Jenn - Pros: Fun, Adventure, Excitement, Glamour, Actually Going Out, Probably sleeping at Jenn's. Cons: Missing other friends.

Hanging With The Gays - Pros: Gays, Going Out, Fun. Cons: Going Out, Drunkeness, Making a Fool of Myself, Flipping Out.

It's just so stressful having to choose. I dont' know what to do. Nothing sounds fun to me. I hate NYE. There are couples and kissing and fireworks. Actually, I know EXACTLY what I want to do, but unfortunately it's not an option at this moment.

Oh, one good thing is that I found people online with my last name who are JEWISH! So I'm Jewish! I think this is consistent with my family fleeing Europe. It all makes so much sense now! I'm a lot more ethnic than I thought!