I just had a realization. I feel so alone because I don't know how to verbalize my feelings towards anyone. I think this is because there was so much going on in my teen years that seems so much more important than my trivial problems, that I never shared them. So I kept them inside. Instead of talking about my feelings and problems and burdening others, that had, what I felt, more important things to deal with, I tried to handle them myself. Instead I just kept everything inside of me. I internalize everything and it swirls around and makes me crazy.
I'm glad that I finally figured this out. I only wish I knew how to share my feelings, in an appropriate and constructive way. Without feeling guilty.
6 comments:
Likewise.
Beckie
Write in a journal, maybe that will be a good starting point because you are only confronted with yourself. And know that you are worth your feelings. You are Ryan. Stop comparing yourself, I wonder if that leads to your feeling guilty. Courage comes one step at a time Ry-face.
The Colleague
So long as you keep looking back you will continue to bump into the present. You need to look to the future my friend.
I think the journal might help explore some feelings, but the problem is that I can't express them. I just keep them all inside. I don't know how to tell people that I'm angry, or that I'm sad, or what they/we/I can do to get what I need from the situation.
Oh, Colleague, how I've missed you. We need to hang out more. I can't wait for school to start again.
Anonymous. I don't know you, but you are so wise. I am perpetually stuck in the past. That's my biggest problem is that I dwell so much in the past I can't move forward.
I used to deal with similar feelings by taking drives in the middle of the night. Didn't matter where -- anywhere, as long as I had some CDs with me. Sometimes it helped. Sometimes it still does.
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