Based on one gay man's quest to find friendship (and possibly love), UPN is launching a new reality show. This show is wrought with twists and turbulence and the whole time providing entertainment for the whole family (if the whole family likes porn).
PREMISE: "Billy" goes on a series of dates and excursion with the contestants in Ann Arbor trying to make friends (with benefits?). Each week "Billy" will eliminate one contestant thus scorning him (or her?) so they will seek revenge in future episodes. Each week after the series of activities, "Billy" will give the "kiss of death" saying "I love you but I'm not IN love with you, let's just be friends".
It will then be up the person to choose to be friends or curse his revenge in the future. If he chooses to be friends with "Billy" he can stay in the game by accusing another contestant of being a 1) witch or 2) in love with "Billy". If a contestant is accused of being a witch, he must wear a false nose for the next activity. If a contestant is in love with Billy, he must hide his true feelings or he will get the "Kiss of Death" in a future episode.
If he chooses to scorn "Billy" he will go to the Wheel of Scorn to choose how to seek his revenge on "Billy". The options for scorn are: 1) syphillis in a syringe 2) abusive rhetoric on a bathroom stall 3) sleeping with his best friend 4) throwing a drink in his face 5) billboard of embarassment or 6) saying "talk to the hand" and meaning it. After "Billy" is scorned by the contestant, said contestant will then leave only to spread rumors and ignore "Billy" in the future.
Also, in this game, anything goes to eliminate the other contestants. Anything.
"Billy" wins when there is one person left who has not scorned him and is not in love with him. If the last person remaining turns out to be in love with him, "Billy" loses. The contestant only wins if he can get "Billy" to fall in him.
Here are some possible contestants:
Johnny Clap: He didn't get his name because he likes to applaud
Angelina P Jolie: The P in her name stands for Penis because she's a male impersonator of the famous actess
Dan: Dan is manipulative and conniving and was voted "off the island" on another popular show, he has a hobo fetish
Kyle: Cute, charming, and all around nice guy...oh yeah and he has a million dollars
Tim: Codependant, insecure and stupid, and that's just one of his multiple personalities
Petey-pie: A rabid squirrel looking for nuts
Snoochycooch: That's right the entire band is a contestant, it's like an orgy 24/7
What will happen? Who will win? Who will give? Who will receive? Find out this fall on UPN.
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4 comments:
"Oh my stars and garters..."
Sorry, my last comment double-posted and I tried to delete it. Now it looks like I'm just being sketchy. Booo!
Only anonymous because I have no account.
Ryan, I think you're making this all up.
Beckie
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